Firstly, thank you all for being here today. I think it’s a testament to Mum and the lives she touched that so many of you wanted to be here. The family and I take great comfort and pride in knowing just how loved mum was and will always be.

I’ll try my best to get through this, but if I don’t, I’ve got my besties on hand to step up for me if I

need them, but for Mum, I hope I can find the strength to see this through.
I’ll start with some messages I received from friends about Mum.

Her house was always open, to everyone, she worked hard, was as quiet as a mouse, but fierce when she needed to be. She loved her children, never stopped loving Maria, she loved Dad, she loved her family and friends and absolutely adored her grandsons.

She had an unwavering support and belief that you (me) could do no wrong. It’s fair to say I more than tested that on many occasions.
We had our moments of falling out as any mother and son do, but it would never last, we always made up with a hug, if you’re English, but for the Welsh folk amongst us, it’s a cwtch. A cwtch is the solution to all disagreements. I’ll miss a cwtch with mum more than anything & I’m sure her grandsons will miss grandma’s tickles & the tickle on the hand.

I shared so much with mum, the good, the bad, the ugly, and many drunken tales, but regardless she always saw the best in me, as she did of others too.

Mum was a bit daft at times, but that endeared her to all of us. I remember many years ago when they attempted to do an around the world challenge in a hot air balloon. Mum thought they’d be doing that in a standard wicker basket – it still makes me laugh to this day.

Maria and I both had the fortune of working with Mum at the old Lutterworth swimming pool. We had so many laughs and giggles, it didn’t feel like work because of it. Special memories that I will hold dear to my heart.

It’s strange that Mum ended up working at a swimming pool, she couldn’t actually swim that well. Even more ironic that all 3 of her children became competitive swimmers, Gareth excelling in the sport, and Gareth and I have built careers from it.

But that was Mum, she followed and took great interest in whatever our passions were. She’d like the same music as us – George Michael with Maria, Embrace with Gareth, some indie bands with me. However, none of us influenced the love for Matt Cardle – we’re definitely not guilty for that one!

Gareth and I are big Moto GP fans, so Mum became one too & a big fan of Valentino Rossi. Dad loved his powerboats, so Mum took a keen interest in this, granted she would pick her favourite boats based on colour, but that didn’t matter one jot, she was involved and engaged in any passions we have. She even became a swimming timekeeper and became heavily involved in committees to help run the sport locally.

Mum would always support any of our interests and encourage us to give things a try. She wasn’t the most naturally sporty person, but that didn’t matter she’d still have a go. Maria’s passion was majorettes / baton twirling, we had to go all over the country and spend weeks in Devon. Even then mum stepped up and did a parent performance to the Wurzels – I am a cider drinker!!! As a son, back then an utter cringe moment as I’m sure Lisa and Dean would agree, but now I look back with so much laughter. Perhaps Eric and Linda will show us the dance in the cricket club later!

Evan and Dexter know only too well that Grandma would try having a kick about with them, they used to laugh so much at the tongue out, toe poke. I don’t think they’ve ever stopped laughing about the time she actually managed to kick the concrete floor and break her toe rather than kick the ball. It was having a laugh and giving things a go with those most important too her, that mattered most, it’s an endearing feature of mum that she didn’t mind laughing at herself.

Rugby match days in Cardiff she was never too interested in coming to the game, but she still enjoyed the day out in Cardiff. Somehow, she would always make new friends in the pub and end up shopping with new girlfriends or being chatted up by some French fans in fancy dress. Such fun days out with Mum, Dad, Gareth and I.

As for shopping, don’t get me started. The only lady that I know that can go in for milk and come out 20 minutes later with 2 bag loads! She loved a bargain, even if we didn’t need it, it might be useful one day, right! As I’ve helped Dad to organise the house a little, we’ve found many things you would never know you needed! Finger yoga, complete with leggings for the fingers, a pumpkin carving spoon, every flavour of tea bag you could possibly imagine! We even found a lady’s golf top, was Mum planning on joining Dad on the golf course instead of sitting in the spas, that would have been fun to watch! What I do know is that the National Trust gift shops have definitely lost their number one customer for jams and curds!!!

The boys know only too well that Grandma loved a National Trust visit – Evan said yesterday, we must have been to about 100 of them, that and the annual chocolate gorge at Cadbury’s World.

There’s an awful lot of unopened face creams in Mum’s bedroom. Yet her face hardly bared any wrinkles. She had beautiful flawless skin right to her final days that belied her age. Even nurses in hospital and hospice commented on her youthful skin and asked her what her secrets were. 69 but certainly didn’t look it.

It’s fair to say Mum lived with a broken heart for 30 years after the tragic loss of Maria. I hope she is now at peace and dancing with Maria to stereophonics Dakota, her absolute favourite song. That song will be played after me, so feel free to get up and dance for Judy or just use the time to reflect on your own memories of Mum.

How Mum and Dad have lived with that for so many years and stayed together through the most awful circumstances is testament to their love of 54 years. Despite that heartache I think they did a decent job with Gareth and especially me (but I am a little bit biased). Her spirit will live on through Gareth and I and of course Evan and Dexter.

I think it would be wrong of me not to mention some thanks and I apologise in advance to anyone I might miss, but I repeat – thank you to all of you for being here today.

Thank you to Mum’s neighbours, you’ve been a great support network and strength for Mum, particularly in these final years, she loved her hour long chats when putting the bins out.

Joceyln as Mum said during their golden wedding anniversary, thank you. Your friendship and support undoubtedly gave her strength to enjoy life and keep living despite the cancer.
Mum and Dad enjoyed plenty of walking in recent years, but as Jocelyn and anyone walking with Mum will know only too well. If there were any cows in a field, she’d quite happily take a 3-mile diversion. She was absolutely terrified of cows. But in contrast, she’d happily walk miles out of her way to visit alpacas, she strangely loved alpacas her favourite animal.

Val and Dave – thank you for those beautiful words today. Mum’s oldest friend and Barry girls together for decades. I have to say the Wilton and Keating family holiday still holds as one of my most memorable. A narrow boat holiday where we ended up no more than about 10 miles from Lutterworth, but so much fun regardless. I don’t think Mum ever stopped laughing that the one person to fall in the canal was Dave – the one person who went sailing regularly. Special memories indeed.

Becky, Ruth, Charlotte and all Maria’s friends – thank you for always staying connected to Mum. You kept the spirit of Maria alive, and you’ve no idea how important and precious that was for her to see you all doing well and living the life Maria couldn’t. A drunken phone call from Becky and I to Mum when we randomly bumped into each other in Sydney was a special moment for her, and then spending some time together and sharing memories of Maria for several weeks afterwards in Australia brought mum great solace.

To my mates – Pete, Markie and Rob.
Pete coming straight down to Lutterworth and helping in a moment of need as soon as he heard the news and coming into the hospice to say goodbye. I know Mum loved you as her own, despite the stinky feet she accused you of, and that meant so much.
Markie, I know you get upset that for many years us guys drifted apart, but you made Mum so happy in these last years. You were the one with the biggest cajónes and reconnected us all. Mum was so so happy to see us all back together and being idiots again – she loved you for that and loved having all of us back in her life. Plus, you caused quite the stir as the hunky fireman in uniform visiting Mum in the cancer ward.
Rob (& Sarah) whilst Mum had to shield during covid, you helped with their shopping and other chores is something I’m eternally grateful for, and Rob being a DJ at their 50th wedding anniversary made the night. I have special photos and videos from that night of Mum dancing around like a teenager again – Mum had so much fun, we all did. A perfect fare well.
I love you guys, as did Mum.

To Mum’s brothers Rob, Phil and families – thank you for always being there for Mum, your little sister Judith. From my understanding a little sister in your youth that probably bossed you both about a bit and tried to keep a wild Phil under some sort of control. I hear some of the Barry house parties in the sixties were quite legendary! She loved chatting on the phone and spending time with her brothers that’s for certain.

Bridget, you gave Mum – 2 of the most amazing gifts that she utterly adored, her grandsons Evan and Dexter. She loved you and thank you.

Evan and Dexter, you speak to anyone in this church today. She spoke about you chaps literally all the time, they probably feel they know you because of it. She loved you both so much and was super proud of you. Be the best you can be at whatever you decide and always hold grandma in your heart and continue to make us all proud. Grandma loved seeing the photos of us in Rome before she passed, and Dexter she was so happy that you’d finally been to watch Roma.

Gareth, you were so much fun as a toddler and that never stopped. You are the baby brother to lots of people in this room. You kept Mum and Dad young and happy through difficult times. You held us all together. Mum was and always will be super proud of everything you’ve achieved and continue to achieve. Keep being you, as we love you for it. Harriet, she loved you as her own too.

Last but not least, Dad. You’ve been a superhero to Mum. 54 years together, and you’ve come through thick and thin. You were a special team; the best Gareth and I could wish for. Holding hands with Mum until the end will always hold a special place in my heart. Mums at peace now partying with Maria, Gran, Lis and Nan & Jack. Cancer has taken Mum from us far too soon. But I know Mum wants us to live life to the fullest and we still have each other. The greatest honour we can give to Mum is to be thankful for every day, thankful for the memories she gave us, and live our lives as she would want us too. I’ve got you Dad and remember – I’m in Charge now, I’ve even got the badge to prove it.

To Mum from Dad, thank you for the good life you shared together, and how together you are both so proud of the whole family. Thank you for the memories and special times.  

From my own perspective Mum has paid a real interest in our careers and my current role, as part of this role I look after a programme in Greater Manchester called prehab4cancer. As a tribute and in memory of Mum, I vouch to make this the best programme it can possibly be, and through hard work and tenacity learned through Mum and Dad. I will strive to make this a national programme that all those effected by cancer can benefit from.

A testament to Mum, is how much she cared and wanted to help others. Despite her cancer Mum and Dad volunteered to deliver talks about cancer, the treatment, their experiences, even talking at a big event at Leicester Tigers ground, she remained so positive throughout. I’m super proud of both of them for that. Just another example of their selflessness and my mum’s innate nature to support and help others.


I’ll finish with a couple of childhood holiday memories of Mum.
As I said before Mum wasn’t a great swimmer, but I still remember a day of Maria trying to give Mum a swimming lesson in the sea at Jackson’s Bay, Barry. I was off searching in the rock pools, Dad having the unenviable task of stopping baby Gareth from eating sand, Gran sat in a deck chair dressed in her Sunday best doing her knitting. Maria in the water with Mum helping to improve her swimming. I wasn’t really paying attention, but I do remember and can hear the laughter and giggles from them both like it was yesterday. Finally, I heard a ‘yes Mum keep going’. I looked up to see Mum doggy paddling across the bay. Maybe 10 or 15 metres of swimming I’m not sure. Maria would have been a swimming teacher and competitive swimmer at this time and it’s another example of Mum wanting to be fully engaged with the things that were important to her children, and a special bond between mother and daughter.

Finally, picture the scene Maria 16 or 17, me around 14, Gareth, 18 months old or so. We were on a family holiday to Devon and took a day trip to a wildlife park I think called Combe Martin. You leave pushchairs at the front door in exchange for a backpack to carry Gareth in. I seemed to get the short straw and carried Gareth most of the day, regardless, we come to a section, reptiles and insects. Staff have a tarantula asking if anyone would like to hold it in their hands. No chance from me, fortunately with Gareth on my back I had a perfect excuse. Maria and Dad, no way. Up steps Mum, yes, I’ll hold it. What!?! She’s terrified shaking like a leaf and they place a tarantula in her hand. Gareth is freaking out and pulling my hair, Maria scarpered, and Dad took photos. It still shocks me to this day that she did it, and when it started walking up her arm I think wow good skills Mum, very brave. When the tarantula was taken off her again, she did an almighty shudder. I’m still in awe of that bravery.

It was that bravery that she showed right until the end of life, protecting her family from the truth for as long as she possible could, as she wanted us to get on with our lives.
For me that tarantula story is one of many life lessons from mum. Being frightened is ok, but that shouldn’t stop anyone from giving things a go and I will always remember that story and live by that message too.

I’m frightened now, not having Mum around will be hard, but I wouldn’t be Judith’s son if I didn’t face that fear, support and love those around me and make the best of every opportunity I can in life, and I hope everyone in this church, can honour Mum, Judy to most of you, in the same way.

10 minutes talking about Mum can never do justice to the 46 years of love, support and protection that Mum has given to me, and her family and I look forward to reminiscing about Mum at the cricket club later.

Drosodd I chi Kelly Jones

Dwi’n dy golli di, dwi’n dy garu di, Dioch Mum, Dioch.